Monthly Archives: November 2003

Dinner With Sonace

I went to din­ner with Sonace tonight at the Black Tomato. I ordered what I nor­mal­ly get there, and rec­om­mend­ed a seafood dish to Sonace, since he’s a big seafood eater. I had a very inter­est­ing red wine with my red meat, but unfor­tu­nate­ly I for­got the name of it. There was a slight­ly sweet start with an unusu­al fruit flavour, some­thing I did­n’t rec­og­nize. The wine was burst­ing with taste and had an amaz­ing, mel­low fin­ish. I want­ed to see him before I head­ed off to Hong Kong, to see what he’s been up to. He lost a lot of weight when he stopped play­ing foot­ball, and was sport­ing a slick pair of glass­es. Now he looks like a smart guy, going for his law degree.

Why I Changed Animal Hospitals

I just tried to take Patches to the vet hos­pi­tal, but it turns out that the appoint­ment was sched­uled for tomor­row instead. I’m not sure if the mis­com­mu­ni­ca­tion is my fault or the interns’ fault; I doubt it was me, but it could be either. Now my plan­ning has been fucked, and I just wast­ed $40 in taxi mon­ey after deal­ing with annoy­ing interns (the hos­pi­tal has amaz­ing doc­tors, but com­plete bitch­es for interns). I’ve been want­i­ng to get this appoint­ment over with for so long. Patches might be sick and I’m leav­ing to go home soon, and I need to make sure he’s okay before I leave. Trolley has the car next week so he’ll help me take Patches then. I was going to drown my frus­tra­tion in break­fast sausages, but I ran out of them yes­ter­day.

Scattered Veil

I’ve real­ized that I have a hard time look­ing in the eyes of peo­ple I can’t stand.

It’s as if I don’t want to be dis­hon­est to them. That no mat­ter how much I hate them, I still feel like they deserve to know the truth. At least I can be…hon­ourable about this, inde­pen­dent of how I feel about the per­son.

I hold hon­esty at a very basic lev­el of human integri­ty. I can’t believe how many peo­ple I know who pre­tend to be friends with peo­ple they can’t stand. It all seems so pho­ny, unless they’re forced to be friend­ly due to spe­cif­ic cir­cum­stances (such as being mar­ried into a new fam­i­ly, mov­ing in with unknown room­mates, etc.). Sometimes the false friend­li­ness gives peo­ple the wrong idea, and they start to hang around even more, and every­thing just gets worse.

I’m glad that I find it hard to lie to some­one, although I’m also a lit­tle scared by the fact that it’s so hard for me to hide some­thing such as this. I’ve always been a ter­ri­ble inter­preter of body lan­guage, and in turn have nev­er had much luck with hiding/manipulating my own. Of course I can hide it when I real­ly want to, but it’s a lot hard­er when I don’t give a shit about the per­son. Most peo­ple, I don’t care enough about to actu­al­ly hide any­thing.

And it shows.

Non-Drinking Test Run

Aaron and I tried a “non drink­ing” test run at the Honest Lawyer yes­ter­day. I’ve nev­er real­ly need­ed alco­hol to have a good time around peo­ple like Aaron and Trolley. For some rea­son I already get pret­ty hyper and already act crazy around them, like I’m an ener­gy sink. I’ve always viewed alco­hol as anoth­er tax that I was shelling out for, like cig­a­rettes or lot­tery tick­ets for some.

It was good to be more con­scious about every­thing going on and not have to feel like shit the next day. Aaron wants to try giv­ing it up alto­geth­er or drink­ing every oth­er time we go out, but I’m pret­ty fine with cold turkey. I doubt I can com­plete­ly give it up, espe­cial­ly since red wine goes with my beef spaghet­ti so well and the fact that so much alco­hol tastes so good by itself, but I’ve nev­er real­ly felt the need to swig the liq­uid courage. The crav­ing for an occa­sion­al binge will always be there, of course, but those are few and far between.