There Is No Such Thing As Love

Let me give it to you straight, straight like an arrow.

I’ve had these words stuck in my head for some time now. Lyrics from the titular Dears track I first heard in university, back when I would go home in the summer and watch The Wedge on Friday nights.

I know that’s awfully cynical to say, but I need proof that it is possible today.

I just wish I could accept that fact. I’m starting to wonder if that’s why I keep hearing the words in my head. It’s my subconscious reminding me, keeping me grounded.

Maybe that’s why we watch these movies. Hollywood would have us believe that love exists.

It’s the same story, where guy sees girl, falls in love, and happily ever after. In between, there’s always the overused plot element of the guy winning over the girl by revealing himself and his feelings. After all, this alone is enough to win any girl over, regardless of whether she found him attractive or not, she was married or single, or he was the nerd and she was the cheerleader.

But love doesn’t exist in real life, as much as I want to believe that it does.

Not for me, anyway.

130 comments

  1. Somebody put it like this, you should be celebrated by others, not tolerated learn the difference very quickly, and save your self some much needed time.

  2. Love is an illusion & conditional, but hatred is real.

  3. Only true example of love is when mom breastfeed her toddler.

    • It is the pure unconditional love.

  4. You know why we believe love exist, because if it kills me, I’m going to make somebody give it to me. And then I may or may not give it back, depends on how I feel.

  5. There is but not like they show in movies and books and romance. Thats infatuation!
    I was brought up in a household where my parents couldn’t love me for who i am so i started believing that there is no love. I believed there was no love and hated everyone who pretended to love until i landed on my soulmate. Its very much real in the heart. But he taught me to love myself first like all soulmates. Love is within us, not outside.

    • Yes but have the the time there’s usually no one out there (except for you) whos willing to come to another person (attractive or not) and say that they really like you. Half the time it’s only a pity response.

  6. There is no such thing as love, it’s a mystical unicorn. I’ve prayed, pleaded and I’ve given everything to nearly every relationship I’ve been in. I wanted so badly to be loved and to love and nope. I can without a doubt tell you it is a fantasy. People date people, figure out about each other, decide if there are benefits to keeping them around and then ride the gravy train until the benefits run out! It is what it is.

    • Speaking to the preacher. I was in a relationship, and she broke up with me. Ever since I’ve been wishing for something relatively good to happen to me but the roller coaster still continued straight down to hell for me.

  7. I have been cheated on by every man I had ever dated. Love is a high or short term feeling with a brutal crash. Its not really love, just chemicals a person can stimulate for a while until theyve grown bored with you and go chase after other women. As the challenge of you has been conquered, they want someone new. Women throw themselves at men for no effort whatsover. Women have gotten easier and more available, so men are naturally cashing in. STDs and divorce are at all time highs. Ive wasted so much of my life devoted to rships and being upset over cheating. I cant help but know from experience there is no such thing as love. People will keep you around only as long as you serve, satisfy, or give them something they want

    • I think you nailed it M you and let me laugh it’s chemicals and your usefulness it’s over.

    • I for one guy would say that I have never been in love. It always seems that the gal I would like to be in a committed relationship is never interested in me. Geeze, I’m not rich, I am not famous and I haven’t made any real impact on peoples lives. I could also talk about the depression brought on in part by the fact that I was circumcised shortly after being born. I am just now in my 60’s learning about the damage to my physical and mental health caused by this process. Parents need to be educated on the issue and stop mutilating their male children. It causes PTSD, depression and physically damages the penis. How can any woman love someone with all this baggage? They won’t now or ever.

  8. What happens if in the relationship, one person is madly in love with the other, but the second person doesn’t believe that love is a thing? Do they continue, or would it just work out that the fist person is going to crash and burn in a pit of sorrow and depression over the second person, who even after all the time spent together didn’t even love them in the first place. What would be the most likely outcomes of their relationship lasting?

    • It could last a long time it just depends on your usefulness to each other, really what do love have to do with it. If each of your desires change you both will look in other directions to fulfill those desires, unless one of you, get low self-esteem and become the others slave.

  9. Just chemicals a person can stimulate for a while…That’s the core of what they call love!!! Your sentence was great Ms “M”. Like…

    Just a dependency made of spending time together…something which can be experienced with several persons.

  10. Love exists, but it is not yours to control, or anybody’s in fact, no matter what we do or say . All you can do is let it flow through you from its source [and that is not your heart] and feel it with the part of you that is meant to feel it [yes now its your heart]. and that is it.Now what most people mean when they say,; I want to find true love. is I want someone I desire to love me, and they set about finding this probably impossible person,and to make sure they do not get rejected or let down we attach all these qualifications this perfect person must have before we accept them.Well that sure don’t make it likely.Love is actually quite easy to do ,that is if we remove the conditions. You cant make people really love you ,all you can do is love them and the strange thing is ,what you give comes back ,maybe not how you thought it would but it does come back.If you can live like this you will not feel so alone or so incomplete. Have faith and let it flow,switch off the accusing voices in your head and just be yourself ,as Kipling said meet with triumph or disaster and treat those two imposters just the same. Good luck and best wishes to all you searchers out there.

    • Firstly let me say, I am very encouraged by your words and agree or understand most of it. But from personal experience, I can say it doesn’t always come back as you say. No matter how much you declare your love for the other person, if they have decided that they no longer love you then you must leave. It is like a one-way switch.
      Once they declare they don’t love you anymore that’s it, they not going to suddenly say I love again no matter what you say or do. I want to believe that love exists and I feel it in my core, but as you get older you tend to lose faith in love, and question whether it is worth at all. It is a quite risky business after all. A person can live a happy life without another person, but I do still recount those moments when I was ‘walking on air’ in love.

  11. Well here is the very real truth what i am going to say which many of you will either believe me or not. Well first of all unfortunately we live in a very completely different time today since this obviously isn’t the good old days anymore. Women back then were certainly very easy to meet with no trouble at all since most men never had trouble meeting women at that time. Both men and women in those days never had any money since they were struggling just to make ends meat to get by. Today i will very much admit that women have choices since they have their independence now which has really changed them for the worst of all. And with so many women that now have their careers today making a six figure income which tells the whole true story right there how they have really changed. Most women now are very high maintenance, independent, like i just mentioned, very selfish, spoiled, greedy, picky, narcissists, and so very money hungry as well. It is most of these type of women today that will only want the very best of all and will never settle for less either. So it is very obvious that these women will never go with a man that makes much less money than they make since they will usually go for men that have money which makes these women very sad and pathetic altogether now anyway. Just too many Golddiggers nowadays that these women are to begin with, and they’re nothing but users and losers when it comes to money since they will usually take advantage of men that have money. So it is very obvious why many of us good innocent men really can’t find real true love today with these very stupid women around that have really ruined it for many of us men in the first place, and many of us men here really Aren’t to blame here at all either since it does really take two to tango today.

    • The good old days weren’t good. You’re just a whiner.

  12. There never was. Nothing new.

  13. “Love” as such does not exist on this plane. If it did, healing and decent medicine would supercede the desire of all these high and mighty corporations for money and wealth. We would be focused on the cure for diseases, poverty and world hunger. There is too much materialism in this world right now. “Love” – that which is unconditional, spiritual, which imparts inner feelings of freedom and peace is difficult to obtain but all too easy to lose.

  14. Love does not exist it’s make believe we are all told so we can spend money and celebrate things such as anniversaries or marriage n even divorce it’s just a way to make jobs for people…there is nobody in this world that will have your back besides yourself call me savage or cruel but it’s the truth! In the beginning u may be attracted to someone and enjoy their company but it’s only because it’s something new then that wears off ita like what everybody says chemicals your body makes up…I don’t believe we were made to be with one person for all our life cuz from my experience it just gets worst over time till u eventually begin to hate each other or can’t stand being around them. Sure I have children n pray that I’m wrong and when they grow up they will both find men that will treat them like princesses like they deserve but my nightmare n the truth of the world is chances of that happening is slim to none… I just hope I can raise them to understand they don’t need anybody to make them happy and to be independent! Never rely on anybody cuz they will always hold that over your head!

  15. Love is something created to sell things and trade wealth. It is the only weapon women use and the beginning of manipulation, a woman’s toolkit to obtain material wealth.

    Women will never risk anything in their pathetic lives. They have the advantage of lying, cheating, stealing, and smear campaigns with the law backing them up every step of the way.

    They peddle words like abuse when things don’t go her way. She will lie about you, ruin your reputation, and steal your hard earned life and children the first chance she gets.

    Mila Kunis for example: she NOW admits she was an asshole to Macaulay Kulkin, but she is now married to Ashton Kutcher and she got what she wanted – so no risk there. And no one cares to look at her lack of integrity.

    Chris Hardwick lost everything – because an ex girlfriend was mad because she wasn’t as successful as him. So she wrote a bullshit essay and posted it on the internet and achieved her aim – to destroy his life, by claiming abuse. He showed texts of her begging to come back and proved he did nothing wrong. And he still lost everything he built.

    There are millions of examples of women using abusing and lying with no accountability. A woman can rape a child and walk free. America is done. There is no integrity left. Look at your world leader, your representative to the world – a fat, lying, cheating, piece of shit named Trump. He is a proven rapist, a racist, and an imcompetant fool.

    He is perfect for America.

    You have only one life. If you value it, have integrity. And leave America for the horrible people and go somewhere where integrity remains.

    If you are male, never forget that in America it is always your fault. No matter how much evidence you have to clear your name, it won’t matter.

    Thank women for that. And the moronic little boys who back them up believe in fairy tales. There is no love, in America there are only symbiotic relationships.

    • Mr. Women hater,
      you really have issues. I would strongly advise you to do therapy!

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