There Is No Such Thing As Love

Let me give it to you straight, straight like an arrow.

I’ve had these words stuck in my head for some time now. Lyrics from the tit­u­lar Dears track I first heard in uni­ver­sity, back when I would go home in the sum­mer and watch The Wedge on Friday nights.

I know that’s awfully cyn­i­cal to say, but I need proof that it is pos­si­ble today.

I just wish I could accept that fact. I’m start­ing to won­der if that’s why I keep hear­ing the words in my head. It’s my sub­con­scious remind­ing me, keep­ing me grounded.

Maybe that’s why we watch these movies. Hollywood would have us believe that love exists.

It’s the same story, where guy sees girl, falls in love, and hap­pily ever after. In between, there’s always the overused plot ele­ment of the guy win­ning over the girl by reveal­ing him­self and his feel­ings. After all, this alone is enough to win any girl over, regard­less of whether she found him attrac­tive or not, she was mar­ried or sin­gle, or he was the nerd and she was the cheerleader.

But love doesn’t exist in real life, as much as I want to believe that it does.

Not for me, anyway.


  1. Somebody put it like this, you should be cel­e­brated by oth­ers, not tol­er­ated learn the dif­fer­ence very quickly, and save your self some much needed time.

  2. Love is an illu­sion & con­di­tional, but hatred is real.

  3. Only true exam­ple of love is when mom breast­feed her toddler.

    • It is the pure uncon­di­tional love.

  4. You know why we believe love exist, because if it kills me, I’m going to make some­body give it to me. And then I may or may not give it back, depends on how I feel.

  5. There is but not like they show in movies and books and romance. Thats infat­u­a­tion!
    I was brought up in a house­hold where my par­ents couldn’t love me for who i am so i started believ­ing that there is no love. I believed there was no love and hated every­one who pre­tended to love until i landed on my soul­mate. Its very much real in the heart. But he taught me to love myself first like all soul­mates. Love is within us, not outside.

  6. There is no such thing as love, it’s a mys­ti­cal uni­corn. I’ve prayed, pleaded and I’ve given every­thing to nearly every rela­tion­ship I’ve been in. I wanted so badly to be loved and to love and nope. I can with­out a doubt tell you it is a fan­tasy. People date peo­ple, fig­ure out about each other, decide if there are ben­e­fits to keep­ing them around and then ride the gravy train until the ben­e­fits run out! It is what it is.

  7. I have been cheated on by every man I had ever dated. Love is a high or short term feel­ing with a bru­tal crash. Its not really love, just chem­i­cals a per­son can stim­u­late for a while until theyve grown bored with you and go chase after other women. As the chal­lenge of you has been con­quered, they want some­one new. Women throw them­selves at men for no effort whatsover. Women have got­ten eas­ier and more avail­able, so men are nat­u­rally cash­ing in. STDs and divorce are at all time highs. Ive wasted so much of my life devoted to rships and being upset over cheat­ing. I cant help but know from expe­ri­ence there is no such thing as love. People will keep you around only as long as you serve, sat­isfy, or give them some­thing they want

    • I think you nailed it M you and let me laugh it’s chem­i­cals and your use­ful­ness it’s over.

    • I for one guy would say that I have never been in love. It always seems that the gal I would like to be in a com­mit­ted rela­tion­ship is never inter­ested in me. Geeze, I’m not rich, I am not famous and I haven’t made any real impact on peo­ples lives. I could also talk about the depres­sion brought on in part by the fact that I was cir­cum­cised shortly after being born. I am just now in my 60’s learn­ing about the dam­age to my phys­i­cal and men­tal health caused by this process. Parents need to be edu­cated on the issue and stop muti­lat­ing their male chil­dren. It causes PTSD, depres­sion and phys­i­cally dam­ages the penis. How can any woman love some­one with all this bag­gage? They won’t now or ever.

  8. What hap­pens if in the rela­tion­ship, one per­son is madly in love with the other, but the sec­ond per­son doesn’t believe that love is a thing? Do they con­tinue, or would it just work out that the fist per­son is going to crash and burn in a pit of sor­row and depres­sion over the sec­ond per­son, who even after all the time spent together didn’t even love them in the first place. What would be the most likely out­comes of their rela­tion­ship lasting?

    • It could last a long time it just depends on your use­ful­ness to each other, really what do love have to do with it. If each of your desires change you both will look in other direc­tions to ful­fill those desires, unless one of you, get low self-esteem and become the oth­ers slave.

  9. Just chem­i­cals a per­son can stim­u­late for a while…That’s the core of what they call love!!! Your sen­tence was great Ms “M”. Like…

    Just a depen­dency made of spend­ing time together…something which can be expe­ri­enced with sev­eral persons.

  10. Love exists, but it is not yours to con­trol, or anybody’s in fact, no mat­ter what we do or say . All you can do is let it flow through you from its source [and that is not your heart] and feel it with the part of you that is meant to feel it [yes now its your heart]. and that is it.Now what most peo­ple mean when they say,; I want to find true love. is I want some­one I desire to love me, and they set about find­ing this prob­a­bly impos­si­ble person,and to make sure they do not get rejected or let down we attach all these qual­i­fi­ca­tions this per­fect per­son must have before we accept them.Well that sure don’t make it likely.Love is actu­ally quite easy to do ‚that is if we remove the con­di­tions. You cant make peo­ple really love you ‚all you can do is love them and the strange thing is ‚what you give comes back ‚maybe not how you thought it would but it does come back.If you can live like this you will not feel so alone or so incom­plete. Have faith and let it flow,switch off the accus­ing voices in your head and just be your­self ‚as Kipling said meet with tri­umph or dis­as­ter and treat those two imposters just the same. Good luck and best wishes to all you searchers out there.

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