So much to say in my head, but when I sit down, it all disappears. It’s as if being in front of a blank page, with the all the possibilities before me, is catharsis enough.
Many things to do has left me with little time to write. A trip to Toronto for the long weekend means I have to make sure all my batteries are charged (one for the digital camera, two for the HD camcorder, three sets for the flashes), and my memory cards (two for the digital camera, two for the HD camcorder) are cleared.
Thunder has interrupted this post. I opened up the blinds to see the rainfall, and the light from the street lamps has come spilling into the room. This makes me realize that the hot chocolate candle Shirley gave me for Christmas, along with the glare of my Macbook Pro screen, weren’t doing a great job of illuminating my writing nook. I had Thrice playing, but have turned it down so I can hear the sheets of water pouring through the street.
Got a bunch of stuff done tonight. While picking up some groceries, I was served by a bookish girl with braces. She had a distinct lisp, but carried on ebulliently as if she had the most beautiful voice in the world. Later on, as I walked through the mall, I caught this Katherine-with-a‑K slouched back in a seat in the food court, eating dinner with one arm in her lap. It reminded me of an entry I wrote about a girl doing the same thing six years ago. How I wish for that kind of peace and serenity. How long ago that was (university!). How different I was back then.
Been feeling very aloof lately. Not sure if it’s me, or something my mind is doing to protect itself. Maybe it’s a way of disconnecting myself from the world. I must need it right now. This afternoon I was reading from a book of Tai Chi classics Louise bought me, and found one part particularly fitting1: “Do not be concerned with form. Do not be concerned with the ways in which form manifests. It is best to forget your own existence”.
- Listed as the first of the Eight Truths of Tai Chi. [↩]