Privy To All The New Shit

I’ve been in the strangest mood late­ly. Killing my Top Rated playlist every­where I go, yet I skip through 90% of the songs, try­ing to find the right one. Talking to myself. Replaying con­ver­sa­tions in my head.

I don’t quite feel at one with the Tao. I’ve been let­ting small things get to me. It’s as if I’m falling back into my old destruc­tive habits, but upon real­iz­ing this, I fight against it. The strug­gle, when observed objec­tive­ly, is quite amus­ing.

These are excit­ing times. Along with the excite­ment comes ner­vous­ness. It’s turned me into a jum­ble of emo­tions, bit­ter­sweet, and unlike any­thing I’ve ever expe­ri­enced before.

Wish I could do some­thing with this feel­ing.


  1. me too. prow­ly-grow­ly.

    >The strug­gle, when observed objec­tive­ly, is quite amus­ing.
    ain’t that the truth.

    It’s a good time to take up phys­i­cal trades to out­let emo­tion into motion.

  2. Very good point. Unfortunately, my only out­let right now is Tai Chi, which is much more of a calm­ing of the mind than a phys­i­cal out­let. Methinks I should be doing more table ten­nis.

  3. or chi gong. if I under­stand it right, it is some­what like body build­ing in the focus and ten­sion put in areas of mus­cles as a fit­ness work­out.

    I have had one Tai Chi teacher who had a sim­i­lar out­look to the push force being a mus­cu­lar work­out as well. I wish I had done it longer. I can’t remem­ber which vari­ant on form it was.

    Tai Chi was use­ful for me for set­tling mind. I can remem­ber body posi­tions but not con­nect­ing motions.

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