Through all this, I’ve come to realize that I cut people out of my life as a defence mechanism.
When someone hurts me, I distance myself from them so they mean nothing to me.
Often it’s an easy choice — just one wrong word or action — but not all the time. Cutting off my mom was by no means a rash decision; it took years of consideration and plenty of chances before she finally went too far.
What surprises me the most is that even though I now know that I have this defence mechanism, I don’t see a problem with it.
I’ve been hurt by enough people, and I don’t want to be hurt any more.