Monthly Archives: August 2004

Collapse

It’s been a long, exhaust­ing, uncom­fort­able-in-clothes, hard-to-focus day. I got a lot done though, so at least I feel sat­is­fied. I can final­ly col­lapse, for the first time, on my new futon, duvet, and down pil­low, with my blue-green Aduki in my hand and Loo by my side.

The Cracking Sky

I already knew that I had a lot to learn, but it’s only now that I’m feel­ing a lit­tle over­whelmed. Sometimes it feels like I can’t keep track of every­thing, because there are so many things to think, talk, write about.

I have to keep in mind the fact that every­thing should be approached slow­ly. Rushing caus­es con­fu­sion, mix-ups of emo­tion. As much as I’d like to jump head-first into things, I have to pace myself. Learning is an invest­ment, and as long as I can pic­ture what I’m work­ing towards, this should­n’t be too hard. After all, I have the rest of my life, and the only lim­it is myself.

This will be a test.

But, most of all, this will be fun.

I've Been Here Before

Ever look at a morn­ing and think, “I’ve been here before. I was here in the sum­mers of my youth, when the leaves were still lush­ly green, in the cool, dew-dropped morn­ings before the sun rose above the trees. I was here dur­ing the first morn­ings of school, walk­ing to the bus stop through gen­tle sub­ur­ban neigh­bour­hoods, with their well-man­i­cured lawns and their inter­lock­ing bricks. I was here before the Sunday rides into town, for big break­fasts and milk tea. I was here in anoth­er life, and all I’d like is to one day do it all over again.”

Don't Interrupt Me

I hate being inter­rupt­ed. When I’m talk­ing about some­thing, I get into a momen­tum, and inter­rup­tions lose all the momen­tum. It does­n’t mat­ter what I’m talk­ing about or how comfortable/uncomfortable I am talk­ing about it. To me, it’s like try­ing to tell a joke then being told to wait five min­utes right before the punch­line. Although some­one may remem­ber the first part, the momen­tum just dies, and I’d rather just for­get the whole thing than fin­ish talk­ing.

A New Blade

I got to shave with a new razor blade today. My blade gen­er­al­ly out­lasts the razor, and the one I just threw out was in use for over eight months. It was so old that the sooth­ing strips were com­plete­ly worn out. The blades get a lit­tle dull and slight­ly irri­tat­ing, but they still work. I’ve always had baby facial hair, but I’ve noticed that it’s got­ten a lot tougher now. Too bad it’s patchy as hell, like Gabe’s.