So here I am, standing at a table in the meeting room with my two slices of meat lovers, one slice of assorted, a bottle of Coke, and my Pizza Pizza garlic dipping sauce. I’m talking to someone, and my dipping sauce is on the table, since I always save it for the crust. This random guy walks by the table, sees my sauce, and dips his slice in it. Not only that, but he DOUBLE DIPS IT.
I had to stop for a few moments to understand what had just happened. I was completely taken aback, about how someone could just do something like that. Did he think that there was some sort of communal sauce or something? WHO THE FUCK DOES SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
There are fewer things more intimate than the dipping sauce. Sharing dipping sauce is as intimate as sharing bodily fluids, and this man, this black-bearded, inconsiderate man, just stuck his slice in my sauce.
He might as well have slapped his dick on my forehead.
