Ever since I got my iPod, I’ve been a playlist lis­ten­er, as opposed to an album lis­ten­er like Nick. I had 10 main playlists, and each one would be for a dif­fer­ent genre or mood, although I lis­tened to my mood ones much more often, such as my bit­ter­sweet mix or angry mix. Now I’m find my mod­er­ate num­ber of playlists to be insuf­fi­cient. Often, when I step out into the intem­per­ate sky which has been so dom­i­nant late­ly, I won’t be able to find an appro­pri­ate playlist. Nothing match­es my moods now.

I think that my moods and emo­tions have become more sub­tle and diverse in the last year. It’s been hard­er to put my fin­ger on how I’m feel­ing, because noth­ing is as base as a sim­ple “sad” or “angry” any­more. I find that the flavours of my feel­ings have become more intri­cate and con­nect­ed, not only because of simul­ta­ne­ous highs and lows, but also because of a greater appli­ca­tion of dual-sid­ed­ness.

Sometimes it feels as if my emo­tions have evened out, that there is less range to the ups and downs. I’ve learned a great deal from the inter­est­ing set of sit­u­a­tions I’ve been placed in over the last two years. This, com­bined with my zeal­ous­ness for self-improve­ment, has allowed me to become a lit­tle stronger and a lit­tle wis­er. Perhaps, in time, every­thing will even out. I’m just not sure if that’s a good thing or not.

Because I’d prob­a­bly cease to learn.

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