Jealousy is not a familiar emotion to me. I’m never jealous of what someone has, simply because I dislike comparing others with myself in terms of what one may earn/deserve. It’s only in my relationships which any sort of envious emotions surface, and even then, such an onerous emotion happens rarely to me.
Historically speaking, I’m generally over-confident, and such a mindset creates very worry-free relationships. It’s when I don’t have this confidence that my mind starts to wonder. In a way, this is my insecurity getting the better of me. It feels so odd to have to fight off this emotion, to have to constantly remind myself and keep my feelings in check. It’s almost an extreme test of how far I’ve come in my goal to be a cerebral person. When I try to calm myself down I can feel my mind evening out, like a melting candle, leveling out from heat.
So far, my jealousy has been easier to contain than I would have believed. Maybe I’m losing my insecurities better than I know, and I’ve come further as a person than I realized. Because of my inexperience with jealousy, I do salute any jealousy I experience as a mark of true love.
Perhaps some jealousy is a good thing.