Hello, I’m an introvert.
When going through Psychology 1101 to cover a required science elective, I studied the characteristics of introversion and extroversion, but the material never really resonated with me. As I saw it, there are varying degrees of both, I fit somewhere on the introverted side of the scale, and this was the extent of the application of such a subject.
I can force myself to be social, friendly, cheerful (what Shirley and I call being on), but I can only do this for limited amounts of time. Usually I can keep it going just a few hours for a party or gathering, or as long as a few days as required if we’re out camping or snowboarding, but never longer than this.
The rest of the time I spend in my room, away from the world, because the social interactions of everyday life are a huge drain on me. When I’m alone, I recharge in a way I can’t explain. I’ve spent years feeling guilty for this behaviour. The North American attitude is that there’s something wrong with being quiet or unsocial. The most striking memory I have of this was during frosh week, when others would constantly harass me to go drinking, or dancing, or partying with a bunch of people I had never met before.
Now there’s an explanation that makes more sense to me than a simple degree on a scale. In a recent article, neuroscience researcher Marti Olsen Laney talks about the connections between introversion and biology. “It impacts all areas of their lives: how they process information, how they restore their energy, what they enjoy and how they communicate.”
I realize that there’s a greatly significant correlation between the way I behave and my introverted mindset. Introversion is an attitude that affects almost every aspect of my life, deeply rooted to a physiological level. It isn’t something I should be ashamed of or embarrassed about.
And if I can come out of my shell every now and then, I’ll be alright.
Facinating article, thanks Jeff
I understand this perfectly. It’s just the way we’re wired.
I’ve never heard anyone offering explanations or reasons or excuses for being extroverted, yet those of us who tend to be introverted often do those things, or worse, have those things done for us (to us?) by others, as if we or they had to offer up an understanding for what is “wrong” with us.
There is nothing “wrong” with us. It is degrading and a waste of time to offer explanations, and it is an insult for others to do that for us. Most introverts don’t bother anyone. And some of the most obnoxious people I’ve ever witnessed have been high-energy extroverts.
Yeah, I guess you hit a nerve or something…
It appears that I’m not the only one. Makes me realize how many display their introverted behaviours by not raising any eyebrows, which makes it surprising when someone actually admits to it.
And I totally agree that some of the most obnoxious people I’ve met are extroverts. I think it’s because they draw their stimulation from others, especially the opinions of others, and act like poseurs so that others will think of them in a certain way.