we put our feet just where they had to go

Our final days grow ever darker, but win­ter feels far away when I turn on the A/C in the car as we set off on the scenic route. It’s strange to think I’ll never be here again. I do my best to take my time, to remem­ber the smell of every wooden house and twirl of hair and cozy wind. This was never a way for me to escape my life back home, only a jour­ney I knew I needed to take.

But the nov­elty of grey hair and almond eyes has long run out, and now I’m just a man, try­ing to find out where he belongs.

fountain

A mask that smiles.

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take me somewhere nice

It’s night, and a gen­tle song begins on my bed­side speaker. Until this point, I’d always won­dered who’d be the first to hear this song with me. Whose breath I’d feel on my body as the melody got lost in the dark­ness along with our inhi­bi­tions. It wasn’t a song I’d been sav­ing, only one I never had the chance to share until I found myself here, explor­ing the open fields and windswept moun­tains and towns in between.

Sarah and sweater

 

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The willing suspension of disbelief

The stars are clear out here. A train runs through the cen­tre a few times a day, blar­ing a horn as a warn­ing to peo­ple who may be going from build­ing to build­ing by cross­ing the tracks. It’s a tiny vil­lage in a snow­globe, only the snow hasn’t come.

I haven’t been around this many peo­ple in years. I’ve long won­dered what it’d be like to live this life one more time. To have rit­u­als and the­atre plans and reg­u­lar friends. None of this is real, of course, but I don’t mind pre­tend­ing if only for a lit­tle while.

girl in dorm room

Girlcave. Fucking awesome.

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this same flower that smiles today

I find myself resigned to someone’s care. It’s not an easy kind of con­trol to relin­quish, but lately I trust as lit­tle as pos­si­ble in the future and do my best to go along for the ride. As the old poem goes; be wise, strain the wine, or as Zorba would put it, “DON’T BE DELICATE”. I didn’t plan on liv­ing for­ever anyway.

On a cold night, we keep the only promise made, one of those small won­ders that still make me believe. I fit some­where between needs and wants, tem­po­rary relief and long-term side effects, class and home­work, nib­bled lips and bit­ten tongues.

in a field

 

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a well-watered place

The fall is hold­ing out against the win­ter, trees clutch­ing bright leaves before the chill breaks their grips. It’s won­der­fully warm among such colours, and we walk in the val­leys of Appalachia to take in the smell of moun­tain air as rus­tic hands around us work live­stock and soil. In old Aramaic, Damascus means “a well-watered place”, a fit­ting name as the rain soon grows too heavy to be explor­ing the tiny town, pop­u­la­tion 981.

looking over a bridge

 

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Maui Wowie

When Dave and Jenny asked me to film their wed­ding in Maui, there was no way I could say refuse. Soon1 I found myself in the only place in the world where Koa grows, and every tree I passed made me won­der if it would even­tu­ally be made into a ukulele or gui­tar. I was only there for two days, but it was worth every moment in the delight­ful weather, spend­ing time with some of the nicest peo­ple I’ve ever met.

The entire wed­ding group gath­ered for din­ner at Mala restau­rant, over­look­ing the Pacific Ocean and the islands of Lanai and Kaho‘olawe. At this time of year, the Maui sun­set passes in the blink of an eye.

I learned that there are only twelve let­ters in the Hawaiian alpha­bet (which is why so many of the words look the same to me), and the lan­guage uses Spanish vow­els. Each vowel is usu­ally pro­nounced by itself (Wailea is said “Why-lay-ah”). I was sur­prised to see most signs in both English and Japanese; it turns out there used to be a sig­nif­i­cant Japanese com­mu­nity in Hawaii, although most of the Japanese tourists go to see Pearl Harbor instead.

All the locals are super nice, per­haps due to the fact that tourism is one of the only indus­tries left in Maui2; it seems like most peo­ple liv­ing there are in the ser­vice indus­try in some form or another3.

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  1. Soon” being a rel­a­tive term when com­pared to the lim­it­less of time, as it took me roughly a full day and three planes to get there, from Ottawa to Chicago to Honolulu to Kahalui. []
  2. The other being agri­cul­ture that’s mostly been over­shad­owed by com­pe­ti­tion from Philippines. []
  3. As opposed to those from Honolulu, who have jobs related to the mil­i­tary in some way. []

Scotland, Day 10: Edinburgh

We watched Rory McIlroy take the most impres­sive lead in US Open his­tory to win the 2011 title, and when you see these golf super­stars mak­ing sat­is­fy­ingly effort­less shots, you long for the same kind of feel­ing that can only come from some­thing as pri­mal as hit­ting a ball. It’s been years since I held a club in my hand, but I was itch­ing to play and we headed to a dri­ving range, tak­ing it easy on my last day in Scotland.

I’m going home a dif­fer­ent per­son. Not a dras­tic change, but a refine­ment of the growth I’ve had in the last year, and a gal­va­niza­tion of the spirit. This trip has taught me that life is full of hap­pi­ness, and my mem­o­ries of Europe will be filled with the peo­ple and places that have made the last three weeks a rich and won­der­ful experience.

Barney in the garden

Barney likes to roll around in the grass, and some­times he comes back in with pieces of foliage in his fur. He even has a shed with a duvet in it that allows him to sleep com­fort­ably out­side, even when it’s dark and the tem­per­a­ture drops. The back­yard pro­vides a tremen­dous amount of pri­vacy, thanks to all the lush greenery.

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Scotland, Day 9: Edinburgh

A closer look at Edinburgh, occa­sion­ally viewed from the top of a double-decker bus. The road design often doesn’t make any sense, or fol­low any kind of grid, facts that belie it’s medieval his­tory. Some streets are espe­cially wide, so that horse car­riages could make a full turn in them. Keeping these old tra­di­tions may add to the char­ac­ter of the city, but I ques­tion whether it’s worth the added con­fu­sion and frus­tra­tion when try­ing to navigate.

One of the inter­est­ing things about this city is that it can be divided down the mid­dle into dis­tinct Old Town and New Town sec­tions, where the dif­fer­ence in archi­tec­tural style is very striking.

bagpipe player

There’s a bag­pipe busker on this cor­ner out­side the Princes Mall at all times. I think a few of them share shifts; it must be the most lucra­tive cor­ner in the city.

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Scotland, Day 8: Peebles

Peebles is a town of about 8000 inhab­i­tants, with the River Tweed run­ning through it. It’s easy to see why it was recently ranked as the best town in Scotland, as it’s full of small town charm, and is less than an hour drive from Edinburgh. You can stand at one end and see the other, where the build­ings abruptly end and the land goes on as hill and grass. It seems like every other store is a char­ity shop where peo­ple can donate their old clothes, toys, board games, and other sundries.

Peebles bridge and church

 

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Scotland, Day 6: Inverness to Edinburgh

We left for home the next morn­ing after a heavy meal at the bed and break­fast, where every­thing was deep fried, includ­ing my toast. Our route was cir­cuitous, planned care­fully by Dennis so I could see as much of the coun­try as possible.

The thing that strikes me most about the Scottish land­scape is that you don’t need to be on top of a moun­tain to get a good view. There’s breath­tak­ing beauty all around, never obscured by sky­scrap­ers or tree­lines. The air is also some of the most pure and fresh you’ll ever get to breathe, yet neu­tral; it doesn’t smell par­tic­u­larly like flow­ers or foliage, it just smells clean.

grazing sheep

 

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Scotland, Day 5: Edinburgh to Inverness

We took a jour­ney by car through the mid­dle of Scotland along Loch Ness to the city of Inverness1, and stayed at a local bed and break­fast for the night. Inverness is con­sid­ered the Gateway to the Highlands because it’s the most north­ern indus­tri­al­ized city. It has nei­ther the urban con­ve­niences of a mod­ern city or the his­tor­i­cal char­ac­ter of an old one, so remains some­thing of a ho-hum sub­ject in itself, but our short stay was just to break up the drive, and along the way was some of the most breath­tak­ing scenery I’ve ever encountered.

Scotland has long been on the top of my list of places to visit for exactly these types land­scapes, but my favourite things to take pic­tures of are these farm houses under the moun­tains. At the same time, they’re a chal­lenge to pho­to­graph because lit­tle details like sheep and streams of water run­ning through the cracks of moun­tains dis­ap­pear when try­ing to cap­ture the sheer scale of the ranges.

The sun hasn’t been around much. When it rains it’s a fine spray, almost mist-like, but it can be just so dense that you’d get just as wet as if it was com­ing down in “stair rods” as they like to say here. The clouds hang low and shroud the tops of trees and moun­tains, mak­ing you feel like you’re right at the door of heaven.

house under mountains

These houses are so remote and serene, fre­quently with sheep graz­ing all around, and I won­der what life must be like to live among such splendor.

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  1. Meaning “Mouth of the River Ness” in Gaelic. []

Scotland, Day 4: Edinburgh

Edinburgh reminds me of Ottawa in many ways. It’s not the largest city in the coun­try (pop­u­la­tion less than half a mil­lion), but it’s the cap­i­tal, and serves as the finan­cial hub of Scotland. The accents here are very sub­tle and quite posh. Save for the old archi­tec­ture and some­what angu­lar roads, it looks like many Western cities.

Arthur’s Seat is a group of hills that pop up from the hori­zon, high above the city, an is vis­i­ble from my bed­room win­dow. It serves as a visual cue for Edinburgh, and when trav­el­ing out­side, one can always look to Arthur’s Seat to see how far (or close) one is to home.

Braveheart charity

Atop Arthur’s Seat, over­look­ing part of Edinburgh.

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Scotland, Day 3: Edinburgh to North Berwick

Dennis tells me it’s the cold­est Scottish sum­mer in recent mem­ory, hov­er­ing around 14°C with the skies filled with rain. Luckily, I didn’t come here for the weather, came for the views. It’s won­der­fully chilly in the house, just the way I like it cause I can swad­dle myself in warm blan­kets (and mine is also an electric).

We took a short trip in the after­noon and headed east along the coast, mak­ing stops at small towns. It seems like there’s always another in almost every direc­tion, most with pop­u­la­tions barely sur­pass­ing 1000. It’s nice to see a healthy amount of trees and foliage, not to men­tion such beau­ti­ful bod­ies of water. Paris is so urban that I never even wor­ried about bugs.

Aberlady

Aberlady from a distance.

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Scotland, Day 2: Edinburgh

My vaca­tion has finally begun, marked by a chance to do some laun­dry after sweat­ing in the same five sets of clothes for the last 10 days. I tend to travel to put myself out of my com­fort zone, but that’s impos­si­ble here with Dennis tak­ing care of me. I offer to lend a hand in any way I can, but he refuses my help cause he takes plea­sure in tak­ing care of his guests. I’d feel guilty or beholden to him if I wasn’t the same way, but I under­stand, so I hap­pily sur­ren­der myself to his hospitality.

I’m here on a clean break, on my own terms, a detox of the mind and heart and lungs, with absolutely no plans at all. I know that as long as I have Dennis for com­pany, I’ll have a great time.

beach

 

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Scotland, Day 1: Edinburgh

On the plane, I won­dered whether I should con­tinue my jour­ney to Scotland after work­ing so hard in France. After all, it’s been too long with­out my kitty, my famil­iar bed, and my gui­tar. I knew I’d made the right deci­sion as soon as I saw Dennis greet­ing me with his arms open at the bag­gage claim. There’s no bet­ter feel­ing than some­one pick­ing you up at the airport.

waiting in Heathrow

Layover in Heathrow. Terminal 5 is the newest addi­tion and very mod­ern, even with loung­ing couches where many peo­ple take their shoes off and sleep.

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