Sometimes I have to take a step back, and look at things as I did for the first time. I have to keep in mind that one of the most important aspects of this lifestyle is consent. That power flows from the bottom up, not the top down.

That I shouldn’t overstep my boundaries. That in time, more trust will develop, and the relationship will grow, and the boundaries will extend. That with this comes intimacy, strength, and possibly love.

That even with all the responsibility, trust, and faith I’ve been given, I must retain my humility. That power does not need to be exerted to be felt.

That I had none of this, and have been given everything.

I haven’t written a contemplation entry in ages. Things have been pushed aside to make way for new exploration and comprehension.

For so long, I’ve tried to wait before writing about this. My inexperience, and possibly even insecurities, have caused me to approach this subject slowly and carefully. Every day a new idea, a new understanding, a new emotion, a new strength. I’ve felt as if I’ve known so little, but am now beginning to make progress in my learning, am now beginning to understand the immensity of this lifestyle.

Now, there are now too many thoughts to go without record, and I must write.