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The Return of Water

4

Well, I have water. And hot water too. I’ve been doing loads of laun­dry and dishes in the dish­washer. Not to men­tion sweet, sweet BMs on a toilet.

Bathroom ceiling

Bedroom ceiling

But my bath­room and bed­room ceil­ings still look like this. Not to men­tion the coarse dust on every­thing and the uprooted fur­ni­ture. I had sev­eral entries with pic­tures to post, but my colour-calibrated mon­i­tors are sit­ting in the spare room. I have no idea when the con­trac­tor is going to be back to get every­thing dirty again. Otherwise, I’d do some cleaning.

Either the con­struc­tion com­pany is on hol­i­day (which con­tra­dicts what the worker said), or they’re dodg­ing me, because I haven’t been able to get a hold of any­one for days now. I’m stuck in limbo here, lit­er­ally liv­ing in the liv­ing room (what a fit­ting name). It’s left me rather sick and unmotivated.

Date  December 29, 2008
Tags 
Categories  Daily Life Photos

Life Is Pain

4

Hand spot

Sometimes, you stab your­self in the hand with a point, but it’s not sharp enough to break the skin.

Sometimes, the blood comes to the sur­face, and this is as much of your­self as you can show the world.

Sometimes, the pave­ment is cov­ered in snow out­side, and you can drive over 100kph in one spot before the trac­tion kicks in.

Sometimes, you scare your­self with your recklessness.

Sometimes, you real­ize that life is pain.

Sometimes, you have noth­ing left but numb­ness and resolve.

Date  December 23, 2008
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Categories  Photos Random

Water Is Life, But Hot Water Is Living

10

Broken hot water tank

I have no hot water.

In the mid­dle of the week­end, my hot water tank broke down. I called the energy com­pany and was on hold for almost two hours. When I finally got through to some­one to trou­bleshoot my prob­lem, all he told me to do was unplug the tank and plug it back in again. Then he told me to wait an hour and call back to make an appoint­ment with a tech­ni­cian if it didn’t work. I refused to do this (after being on hold for so long already), so I made an appoint­ment right there.

The tech­ni­cian came today and told me that the pipes were leak­ing water, and the black area under at the bot­tom sig­ni­fied a car­bon monox­ide leak1. The entire hot water tank has to be replaced.

The good news is that my hot water tank is rented, so any repairs or replace­ments are cov­ered by the energy com­pany. The bad news is that the ven­ti­la­tion pipe that con­nects the tank to the out­side of the house is no longer up to code, and needs to be replaced before the hot water tank is replaced. The worse news is that my ceil­ing is fin­ished, so it needs to be ripped open for the new pip­ing to be installed then patched up again when it’s done, by an out­side con­struc­tion com­pany. The cherry on top is that nei­ther the pipe instal­la­tion or the destruction/construction is cov­ered by my condo or the energy com­pany, so I’ll have to shell out more money at a time I can’t afford it.

Until then, I can’t shower2, I can’t shave, I can’t do my dishes, I can’t do my laun­dry, I can’t rinse my mouth with­out using painfully cold ice water.

I can hon­estly say that I took hot water for granted.

But I won’t after this.

  1. Thankfully low enough that the two car­bon monox­ide detec­tors didn’t go off [↑]
  2. which is one of my favourite ways to unwind at the end of the day [↑]
Date  December 21, 2008
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Categories  Daily Life Photos

Moments Like This

3

Julie in the Black Tomato

Sometimes, I feel like I’ve been wait­ing to cap­ture moments like this my whole life.

Date  December 12, 2008
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Categories  Photos Random

Lonely Lot

2

Lonely parking lot

Sometimes, you need to get out­side. Dodge the drunks stum­bling through the halls, the peo­ple stand­ing and wait­ing for their groups, the famil­iar faces. Maybe because it’s snow­ing out­side, and you don’t want to miss it, when the sky aches the same orange as you do.

This isn’t your scene, but there’s no one to back you up, so you smile and nod. Fake kisses and oblig­a­tory hugs, think­ing, “I don’t know you, and I never will”. A façade to appear nor­mal, when mem­o­ries come flood­ing back. Sitting alone at a table, won­der­ing why you came in the first place. Times with­out a per­son to make you a promise. Moments with other people’s wives, because he’s secure like that, and wish­ing for noth­ing else. Walking these halls alone the way you’re doing now. Memories you wish were a lit­tle more dis­tant. Maybe you’ll come back one day, and break even, or maybe even come out ahead.

Until then, your indif­fer­ence will keep you alive.

Sometimes you need to take a pic­ture of some­thing, any­thing, because noth­ing you see here is how you feel, and it’s the only way you can scream.

Maybe it’s not so much out­side, where you’re run­ning, as away.

Date  December 7, 2008
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Categories  Photos Random

Urban Growth

6

Me in hoodie and tie

Me in hoodie and tie

Sometimes, I won­der whether it’s me or this city that’s changed more.

Date  November 22, 2008
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Categories  Photos Thoughts

Last Minute Halloween Party

9

Trolley and Steph

Thumbnail: Sushi platter
Thumbnail: Halloween hallway
Thumbnail: Halloween pirate
Thumbnail: Kitty
Thumbnail: Living room
Thumbnail: Me and Trolley
Thumbnail: Halloween pimp
Thumbnail: Pumpkin lights
Thumbnail: Gathering
Thumbnail: Raggedy drink
Thumbnail: Dog skull-and-crossbones cape
Thumbnail: Spooky drinks
Thumbnail: Taking shots
 

Last minute Halloween party means last minute costume.

I’m walk­ing down the con­sol­i­dated aisles of Walmart at 7:30 on Saturday night. The cos­tume pack­ages are all 50% off, and the mod­els on the labels are all pre-teen. I don’t think I’ll fit in the tights of this Batman cos­tume, and this vam­pire cape only goes down to my waist.

I’m sud­denly struck with a fit of nos­tal­gia. Remember that time when I was at that party with Becky, who was wear­ing a witches mask, try­ing to engage her in a con­ver­sa­tion after we met at the Honest Lawyer1? Remember when we went as Supertroopers to the party at the girls house? Remember when I got drunk off that bot­tle of Earnest and Julio Gallo?

I hur­riedly grab a black cowl and bloody knife, and walk to the check­out line. With my full-length leather trench coat, I’m hop­ing it’s enough to gain accep­tance to the party, but not too much to stand out.

As I leave, I won­der if Halloween still exists for those of us past our trick-or-treating days.

So the plan is to get there early. That way I don’t have every­one look­ing at me when I walk in the door. Bail when it gets too loud, or the peo­ple too drunk. But every­one invited through Facebook was told eight while I was told nine, and I’m almost last one there.

Read the rest of this entry »

  1. If you ever read this Christine, I will deny every­thing. [↑]
Date  November 5, 2008
Tags 
Categories  Daily Life Photos

Design By Chocolate

4

Design by chocolate

Date  October 31, 2008
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Categories  Photos

Baby Gensey

10

Baby tongue

Introducing Ryan Kevin Gensey, Aaron’s new baby boy, deliv­ered right on the pro­jected date. I bought him the tur­tle you see in the cor­ner of his bas­ket there.

Baby birth card

I had the chance to hold him before he was a day old in the hos­pi­tal. At first, I approached this idea with some trep­i­da­tion, see­ing as how I carry the pre­con­ceived notion of how frag­ile baby’s necks are, but I couldn’t resist. He’s a lot lighter than Dolly, but some­how just as warm.

Baby foot

Aaron has always wanted a boy first and a girl sec­ond — so the older brother can take care of the younger sis­ter — and it looks like every­thing is falling into the plan.

I’m now offi­cially an uncle.

Date  October 14, 2008
Tags 
Categories  Daily Life Photos

Patterns in the Chaos

8

I hap­pen to have a chance to write now. It’s rain­ing, so nat­u­rally the win­dows are all open.

My life has been some­what chaotic lately. Weekends spent being social have been turned into intro­verted exile, a way of charg­ing my bat­ter­ies once again. The added ben­e­fit is that I have more time to tie up loose ends on my projects. I’m even get­ting back into the still photo medium again.

Dry erase boards

I installed these dry-erase marker boards next to my front door. I use them to keep track of my tasks, projects, and errands, so I can come home and imme­di­ately decide what I feel like doing. The two sil­ver clips are used for hang­ing notes and letters.

Nothing feels bet­ter than putting that thick black line through a task. Writing on frosted glass is pretty tasty too.

Dry erase board closeup

I use the other board for quotes, a way to keep myself moti­vated — or grounded — every time I pass by on the way in or out of the house. It’s also a nice way for me to prac­tice my hand-drawn typog­ra­phy, by try­ing to bal­ance char­ac­ters, words, and lines on the board in dif­fer­ent vari­a­tions in an esthetic manner.

There’s some­thing famil­iar about this. A feel­ing like I’ve been here before, not in this sit­u­a­tion exactly, but in the mid­dle of the chaos.

All I know for sure is that I feel like I can han­dle it much bet­ter than if this was hap­pen­ing a year ago.

Date  October 8, 2008
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Categories  Daily Life Photos

Believing In Her Beauty

9

The torso of my beautiful muse

I tell her she’s beau­ti­ful. Over and over again. As often as I can.

But she shakes her head, and says I only think so because I love her.

The front of my beautiful muse

It’s true. But would I love her any less if she didn’t have those soft, inno­cent eyes? If she didn’t wear her hair up, or down, or curly, or straight, or dif­fer­ent every time I saw her? If her body didn’t curve so dis­tract­ingly when she lets her­self fall into me?

The body of my beautiful muse

It makes me won­der if any­one sees the same thing that I do.

How much of it is her beauty, and how much of it is the beauty I see in her?

To me, her beauty is obvi­ous, not sub­tle in any way.

The legs of my beautiful muse

So I tell her, over and over again.

Sometimes I think she’ll start to believe me if I say it enough.

Date  September 26, 2008
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Categories  Photos Random

Good Times For A Change

8

Before you start read­ing, play this song. It’s a Deftones cover of The Smiths’ song Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want. There have been a few other artists who have done cov­ers too, includ­ing Muse, but only Chino has the kind of raw emo­tion in his voice that matches Morrisey.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (ver­sion 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the lat­est ver­sion here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

This song was writ­ten for right now.

Orchid bouquet

I’ve moved mainly to video. Getting a lit­tle tired of the still pho­to­graph medium. I had my first com­mis­sion this week­end at the NAC, record­ing a jazz trio con­cert in exchange for a few tick­ets for my friends.

If you couldn’t tell, I’ve been obsessed with colour tones and vignetting lately. Making my pho­tos look like old mem­o­ries. Maybe this is a way for me to go back; revert­ing to past expe­ri­ences, draw­ing inward as an intro­vert, regress­ing to a dif­fer­ent time, when all I had was inno­cence but that was enough.

Me in a tie

I’ve been strangely serene. Sleeping well. When things get com­pli­cated I’ve been less stoic, and more light-hearted.

Dolly eating chicken

Maybe it’s the house being clean. Maybe I’m sat­is­fied with the the new dec­o­ra­tions. Maybe it was the last week­end, get­ting caught up on errands and tasks, finally feel­ing like my head is above water.

Maybe it’s the weather. The rain. The wind. The warmth of the sun. The tem­per­a­ture drop. The way I can leave my win­dow open at night.

Civic logo in rain

Maybe it’s feel­ing socially ful­filled. Seeing friends, laugh­ing hard, trips out of town, trips on my own.

Star fingers

Maybe it’s the nights spent hold­ing her, caress­ing every inch of her skin. Maybe it’s the way she held me too.

Chopped vegetables

Maybe it’s the accep­tance. A way I’ve let go where I’ve found myself finally free, and liv­ing. Something I always think I’ve been able to do, only to real­ize a day later that I didn’t before, but I have now, hon­estly.

School bus

Maybe it’s all the movies I’ve been watch­ing in the time between, see­ing myself in every char­ac­ter, every sit­u­a­tion. Going back to high school, being back at university.

Potting plant

I’m not sure what it is, but I know this feel­ing won’t last for­ever. It never has. It’s the flux between storm and seren­ity that moves me.

Been writ­ing this entry over the last week.

In a cou­ple days, this blog turns six.

Maybe I just had a few good weeks.

Date  September 14, 2008
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Categories  Daily Life Photos

Agnes and Sophia

2

Agnes face

Thumbnail: Sophia from front
Thumbnail: Agnes from above
Thumbnail: Sophia from above
Thumbnail: Agnes profile
Thumbnail: Sophia profile
Thumbnail: Agnes side bust
Thumbnail: Sophia side bust
 

Still play­ing around with black-and-white tones. This time, I went with less con­trast, so more of a low-key feel, not just in the over­all scene but in the fig­ures them­selves. In doing so, the tex­ture isn’t so blown-out as in my pre­vi­ous black-and-whites.

I love the dreamy look of high-key, but for more focus on facial fea­tures, I’m start­ing to turn to a greater range of light.

Agnes and Sophia being silly

Thumbnail: Agnes and Sophia faces
Thumbnail: Agnes and Sophia back-to-back
Thumbnail: Agnes and Sophia faces
Thumbnail: Agnes and Sophia being silly
Thumbnail: Agnes and Sophia piggy back
 

In return for mod­el­ing for some of my other projects, I agreed to give Agnes and Soph some por­traits. Siblings are gen­er­ally easy to work with. There’s a com­fort­ing famil­iar­ity that lets them act nat­u­rally together. To tell them apart, one sim­ply has to observe how dif­fer­ently each acts in front of a camera.

Date  September 9, 2008
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Categories  Photos Random

A Day Without Her Is A Day Without Air

13

She swings away

And until I stop breath­ing, my lungs will take her for granted.

Date  August 25, 2008
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Categories  Photos Random

Trolley and Steph's Wedding

4

Changing groomsmen

Not only the day that Trolley got hitched, but a chance to see Adam and Tomasini and Eric and Nick and Alison; the peo­ple I only get to hang out with when camp­ing or par­ty­ing at the farm. I missed Adam and his ever ebul­lient atti­tude most of all, some­thing that never fails to buoy the spir­its. Even though we didn’t get a chance to talk much through all the prepa­ra­tion, it was enough to hear his voice and laughter.

Handshake

Thumbnail: Wedding handshake
Thumbnail: Wedding handshake
Thumbnail: Taking cell phone photos
Thumbnail: Walking to the aisle
Thumbnail: Just married
 

It was back to Stanley’s Maple Farm1 for the out­door wed­ding. The rain con­tin­ued up to half an hour before the cer­e­mony then stopped com­pletely, as if god him­self had a hand in ordainment.

You just need to look at the smile on Trolley’s face to under­stand how happy he is.

The recep­tion was open bar, with prime rib and a dessert buf­fet at the end. I had been wait­ing over a year to have the prime rib din­ner, as I was going through an undi­ag­nosed case of IBS at Aaron’s wed­ding and was left eat­ing bread. Even Pat, my gour­mand friend, said that it was cooked to per­fec­tion, and found out that the venue has a deal with the farm up the road to get the best cuts of meat.

We sur­prised the newly wed­ded cou­ple with the shoe game, where they answer a series of ques­tions with­out know­ing how the other one will answer. They sur­prised us with how many they answered in sync. A good sign for the newly wed.

Thumbnail: Wedding guestbook
Thumbnail: Center piece
Thumbnail: Photographer sticks his tongue out
Thumbnail: Aaron drinks
Thumbnail: Wedding favour
 

Nick humourously noted that there weren’t many sin­gle girls around, but being able to hang out with Aaron in the MC booth made me feel much less awk­ward and aban­doned than the last wed­ding I went to.

At one point, Trolley came up to me and asked me _____ __ _________ ____ _____. It was his wed­ding, but he was con­cerned about me. I couldn’t believe it even entered his mind with every­thing going on around him, and it was cer­tainly the part I’ll remem­ber most about that night.

  1. The same place Aaron got mar­ried. [↑]
Date  August 19, 2008
Tags 
Categories  Daily Life Photos Video
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