Comments on: Someone To Take Care Of Me

By: muyimbwa charles Rayn

muyimbwa charles Rayn — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 09:58:58 +0000

I wish I would get someone to help me in some things about ma life. I’ve tried all the way to survive in this entire world even I reached the moment of sleeping on streets. My life is not as easy as of other people, I know am not the only one suffering in this situation but in my wishes others will be help as I think am gonna be help by any kind person/organisation.

Thanks to you who have read through ma comment and willingly to help me as I will post more about me. you can contact me on (mcryan62@yahoo.com)

By: al

al — Mon, 07 Jun 2010 19:22:55 +0000

I live in NH and need someone(Woman) to help me get back on my feet…I am going thru a divorce( Should be done soon), lost my job of almost 11 years, lost my license( Can afford to get it back), unemployment is not helping and no body wants to hire!

I am not looking for a handout, just a friend/ maybe to grow into something– to help me get back in the mainstream. Hit me back if you want!

By: Life for Beginners

Life for Beginners — Thu, 20 Nov 2008 03:14:46 +0000

It’s good to hear that you know you will survive. I know how easy it is to forget that when we are in the middle of a bad patch, or maybe not even a bad patch, just a ho-hum one where nothing happens or excites us.

Five years is longer than I’ve known my best friend, a girl with whom I share everything and consider my brick — though, hopefully it’s mutual; I don’t just wanna draw on her and not give anything back. Pat sounds like a great guy.

I hope things do get easier for you. *hugs*

By: Xibee

Xibee — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 19:10:39 +0000

You know, we should just all get dogs. : )

By: joe

joe — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 05:55:46 +0000

I’m glad that I’m not entirely alone in my behaviour. In my case, it has absolutely nothing to do with machismo. My simple reasoning is “I just want some peace and quiet”.

I might add that my wife feels almost the same way as Xibee.

By: Jeff

Jeff — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 03:49:47 +0000

@Uncle Joe — I can totally understand that way of thinking. Being constantly doted on is also a constant reminder of how we feel. But I agree that that way of thinking isn't normal; most people are opposite. @Xibee — You also have to understand that some men have too much pride to want to be taken care of. When you do so, you may be implying that they're too weak to take care of themselves. Of course, not all of us are filled with that much machismo. I suppose I'm can be quite high-maintenance in situations like this, and it seems to me like you may also have a very particular way of wanting to be cared for. In those cases we do have to take care of ourselves, not because other people don't want to, but because they don't know how or can't do so effectively. @Edrei — Any choice you make isn't a bad one, as long as you accept the consequences (which it sounds to me like you have). In a sort of backwards way, you're getting what you need from these people even though they're taking advantage of you, because what they offer is important to you and worth it. Even girlfriends don't have all the necessary tools to provide you with support, but in those cases, I find it's more of a case of being high-maintenance than anything else. And for people with mental histories like ours, that makes it even harder to deal with. @Causalien — That's an interesting idea. I suppose that for enough money, some people will care unconditionally (aside from the obvious condition), and do anything.

By: Causalien

Causalien — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 23:02:34 +0000

It also made me understand why those powerful politicians would hire high priced escorts.

By: Causalien

Causalien — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 23:01:43 +0000

I feel the same way.

By: Edrei

Edrei — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 22:05:44 +0000

Would it be bad to say that it is a choice?

It is always a choice, especially if you do know that is what they are there for and that is what they want from you. I’m tired of losing good people over and over again and having to rebuild new human relationships over time. In return for some measure of human company, I made a choice to be used with the knowledge that I am being taken advantage of, so that I don’t feel alone.

I know I rely on my girlfriend, but even that I learned too recently that at the end of it, you’re still on your own. Life does have its tendency to be cruel. I just have to do whatever I can to make the best of it.

By: Xibee

Xibee — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 19:34:43 +0000

To Joe — I have found too often that, my husband responds like you, just at the time when I want to give. It’s difficult for a nurturer to give solace by allowing solitude. I have had to back off and think, well, I guess.… that’s all.…. it’s a guy’s-guy cave thing, I guess.

The other thing I learned about expecting to depend on my guys in my life was that, although there might be a lot of posturing that they wanted to take care of me, when push came to shove and I really needed it, they were pretty clueless as to How to do that.

Even now I think they would make different choices than I would have them make about my welfare, which is a difficult thing to look at. I have resigned myself to taking care of myself first.