Comments on: Psychoanalytic Reflections 05

By: Jeff

Jeff — Tue, 27 May 2008 11:40:00 +0000

@Lucy — I used to seek out people that need to be fixed. For me, it was because I felt like no one was ever there to fix me, so I wanted to help others. Not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing; I haven’t gone through it in therapy.

When I first started my sessions, I was somewhat overwhelmed by everything as well, but I’ve learned that it just takes time, effort, and patience to get better.

@Uncle Joe — A lot of the lifetraps are interrelated. In fact, they often need to be attacked simultaneously for results. You’re absolutely right that taking risks is an accomplishment, but I never saw it this way. I used to see risks as danger and a chance to fall behind.

To change that mindset, I think of two lines from verse 63 of the Tao Te Ching: “Accept difficulty as an opportunity/This is the sure way to end up with no difficulties at all”.

By: joe

joe — Mon, 26 May 2008 17:39:34 +0000

There seems to be a kind of relationship between being afraid of mistakes and unrelenting standards. The latter nurtures the former.

You once said something like taking steps to better oneself is by itself a betterment. In that sense, taking risks is self-accomplishment, no matter what the result, even when it ’s a mistake. In that sense, that’re no unrelenting standards to reach. Sometimes we have to learn to laugh at our own mistakes, and reciprocate by enjoying the lighter side of others’ faults.

By: Lucy

Lucy — Mon, 26 May 2008 16:01:54 +0000

Here is what I am discovering through therapy: One being that I am an extremely needy person and I tend to consistently seek out people that need to be ‘fixed’; the other being there are things about myself that I am discovering that I really don’t like. I’m sure this is not necessarily a bad thing but my eyes are opening wider with every visit. I want more than anything to be happy with what I have and content in the direction my life is taking but I feel at this point that there isn’t enough therapy in the world to help me get there.

By: Jeff

Jeff — Mon, 26 May 2008 11:55:09 +0000

You’re right about our mistakes being related to the amount of risk someone’s willing to take. My problem was that I would miss opportunities because I was barely willing to take any.

I realized that right here is where I want to be, because I already have everything I should need/want (looking at it in a somewhat Taoist way), but I’m still trying to feel that from the very depth of my soul.

By: Sophia

Sophia — Mon, 26 May 2008 02:53:12 +0000

Bah I hit back and lost what I had originally typed :p Anyway I think you’re making good progress by at least identifying with some key things that have always bothered you. We all make mistakes, some more than others but I think that also has to do with how much risk a person is willing to take. You’re very talented and surrounded by people who care, I know with patience and time you’ll get to where you want to be