Comments on: Growing Pains http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/ To be equivocal is to truly live. Tue, 31 Jan 2012 15:14:10 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Jeff http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-30410 Jeff Thu, 05 Feb 2009 20:33:25 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-30410 Thank you for your kind words. Thank you for your kind words.

]]> By: M http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-30367 M Wed, 04 Feb 2009 03:50:04 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-30367 I really like your site. I'm just exploring the blogworld and yours is very calming. Great clean layout, nice photo too. I really like your site. I’m just exploring the blogworld and yours is very calming. Great clean layout, nice photo too.

]]> By: lilly http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-653 lilly Fri, 14 Oct 2005 05:17:40 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-653 A few years ago in a family vacation to Greece I caught my mother off guard, through the entire trip she was cheerful, smiling and trying to look as if we are all having the time of our lives, which wasn't true at all, my sister was doing her Anorexia routine while my mom had pretty severe shoulders problems, we were all annoyed and upset over each other and pretty reluctant to except change in the family situation. At one morning, as every morning in that trip, I went to meet my family near the hotel's arrestant, and I saw my mom reading a book on the balcony, she wasn't smiling or looking manic and happy, my first thought was "she is so old" then I had one of those rare moments of distouchment, of seeing things for what they are and I saw a scared, fragile and discontent person who lives his entire life in fear. I was hoping that this trip would allow me to connect to my parents as an adult, to find some new base to form a grown up relationship on and allow me to get over a lot of my teen anger and so on, in fact, it proved to me that whatever issues I have, I need to solve them on my own since they can't really give me any answers, I realize I was more aware and mature then they ever had been and that I'm pretty alone in the world. In a way it served it's purpose, cause since then I was less obsessed about pleasing them. A few years ago in a family vacation to Greece I caught my mother off guard, through the entire trip she was cheerful, smiling and trying to look as if we are all having the time of our lives, which wasn’t true at all, my sister was doing her Anorexia routine while my mom had pretty severe shoulders problems, we were all annoyed and upset over each other and pretty reluctant to except change in the family situation.

At one morning, as every morning in that trip, I went to meet my family near the hotel’s arrestant, and I saw my mom reading a book on the balcony, she wasn’t smiling or looking manic and happy, my first thought was “she is so old” then I had one of those rare moments of distouchment, of seeing things for what they are and I saw a scared, fragile and discontent person who lives his entire life in fear.

I was hoping that this trip would allow me to connect to my parents as an adult, to find some new base to form a grown up relationship on and allow me to get over a lot of my teen anger and so on, in fact, it proved to me that whatever issues I have, I need to solve them on my own since they can’t really give me any answers, I realize I was more aware and mature then they ever had been and that I’m pretty alone in the world.

In a way it served it’s purpose, cause since then I was less obsessed about pleasing them.

]]> By: Jeff http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-652 Jeff Fri, 14 Oct 2005 00:56:56 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-652 Thank you all for your insights and kind comments. I've realized that I have yet to look at my own hands and see my fathers. My parents were in their late twenties when I was born, so even if I had perfect memory as a child, I still wouldn't know the first glimpse of what their hands looked like for a few years. Now I wonder if the realization will come suddenly, or gradually. Thank you all for your insights and kind comments.

I’ve realized that I have yet to look at my own hands and see my fathers. My parents were in their late twenties when I was born, so even if I had perfect memory as a child, I still wouldn’t know the first glimpse of what their hands looked like for a few years.

Now I wonder if the realization will come suddenly, or gradually.

]]> By: kiddo http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-651 kiddo Thu, 13 Oct 2005 21:37:24 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-651 we all hope that when our parents are getting old, they will retain their mental clarity. when they are nearing death, that they will go quietly in their sleep, with no pain. we hope. btw i agree, this entry was written so well. keep it up jeff. we all hope that when our parents are getting old, they will retain their mental clarity. when they are nearing death, that they will go quietly in their sleep, with no pain.

we hope.

btw i agree, this entry was written so well. keep it up jeff.

]]> By: ME Strauss http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-650 ME Strauss Thu, 13 Oct 2005 07:07:25 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-650 We don't remember time we remember moments. You have here captured a moment in the same way a photograph does, with as much clarity and detail. It is what it is. My hands are getting older. I see my mother's hands when I look at them. I do not feel sad, I feel like a pair of old shoes that just now feels soft and pliable with time. What you have written is beautiful. Your voice carries your thoughts and feelings with humanity. ME-Liz We don’t remember time we remember moments. You have here captured a moment in the same way a photograph does, with as much clarity and detail. It is what it is. My hands are getting older. I see my mother’s hands when I look at them. I do not feel sad, I feel like a pair of old shoes that just now feels soft and pliable with time.

What you have written is beautiful. Your voice carries your thoughts and feelings with humanity.
ME-Liz

]]> By: mona http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-649 mona Thu, 13 Oct 2005 06:10:55 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-649 time must go by. people get older. theres isnt anything we can do about it, even if it hurts so bad your heart feels like its about to explode. time must go by. people get older. theres isnt anything we can do about it, even if it hurts so bad your heart feels like its about to explode.

]]> By: anni http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-648 anni Wed, 12 Oct 2005 21:14:34 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-648 I remember feeling so terribly sad the day I looked down at my own hands and saw my mother's. Time doesn't wait, ever. Jeff, as always, you impressed me with your eloquent writing. I remember feeling so terribly sad the day I looked down at my own hands and saw my mother’s. Time doesn’t wait, ever.

Jeff, as always, you impressed me with your eloquent writing.

]]> By: wendy http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains/#comment-647 wendy Tue, 11 Oct 2005 08:55:12 +0000 http://equivocality.com/2005/10/10/growing-pains#comment-647 oh god that's sad.. i try to block all that kind of stuff out cos it gets me down. this is exactly why i dont want to age.. because i know my mum will age with me. oh god that’s sad.. i try to block all that kind of stuff out cos it gets me down. this is exactly why i dont want to age.. because i know my mum will age with me.

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