I want to take the bullet,
The one aimed straight for your heart.
I want to meet the wolves halfway
And let them tear me apart,
But that’s not the way they do it here.

I want to lay on the tracks,
Feel hot steel screaming at me.
Expose the bones on my back,
Let me show you what I mean.

Yeah, it’s a different kind of love.
I want to climb barbed wire fences
And warm our hands in blood.

And this is my gift
Asking you to fix my ruined hands.
And it’s a gift that keeps on giving,
And right now it’s all I have to give.

I want to write the perfect song,
And play it just for you,
While you are tangled up in sleep.
I need you more than I’ll ever know.
Until I stop breathing,
My lungs will take you for granted.

—Thrice, In Years To Come

I remember a time in my life when I was scared about love. A set of rather adolescent experiences in high school, of which I only now find myself comfortable speaking frankly, had caused me to cling to an unattainable ideal. In Lolita, Humbert Humbert well describes such a happenstance that similarly “made of it a permanent obstacle to any further romance throughout the cold years of my youth. The spiritual and the physical had been blended in us with a perfection that must remain incomprehensible to the matter-of-fact, crude, standard-brained youngsters of today”.

Eventually, I had given up my ideal, but still felt forever tainted, regretfully breaking more than enough hearts in the process.

And as fleeting as the entire experience was, it still enough to galvanize, to make me want to take that bullet, or let the wolves tear me apart. Being tangled up in that mad love, the love that goes against reason or better judgement, softened the stone in my chest, and it felt like I was finally alive.

Gimmie a girl who can make me feel this way.

The Thrice = Love Series

1. Introduction
2. The Journey
3. As The Crucible
4. Rock It
5. The Rush
6. Far From The End

Entertain the hope that somehow you’ll escape me
Weld the bolts and close the iron gate
Drink deeply the illusion of your safety
My how wishful thoughts inebriate
Masquerade and revel in your opulence
Writhe unfettered by your stabs at ignorance
Swim through hues and whispered tones of heresy
A dozen strokes to run your blood cold enough to believe
Remember me
You look so surprised to see me here
Hells black wings did I over perch these walls
For stony limits cannot hold me out
And now you all die

—Thrice, The Red Death

And now again the music swells, and the dreams live, and writhe to and fro more merrily than ever

—Edgar Allen Poe, The Masque Of The Red Death

It’s simple.

Gimmie a girl who isn’t afraid to ROCK THE FUCK OUT to this song.

The Thrice = Love Series

1. Introduction
2. The Journey
3. As The Crucible
4. Rock It
5. The Rush
6. Far From The End

True friends stab you in the front
Keep you from getting what you want
When one more fix could kill you
They help you realize that
You’re more and less than you first had believed
You’ve so much to give and there’s so much you need
Shortcuts through graveyards and a brand new way to breathe
Three thousand miles just to learn
All that’s gold does not all shine
And helping words aren’t always kind
When one more kiss could kill you
They help you realize that
You’re more and less than you first had believed
You’ve so much to give and there’s so much you need
Shortcuts through graveyards and a brand new way to breathe
Three thousand miles just to learn
How to let my guard down

—Thrice,The Beltsville Crucible

When you look back at the problems you faced a year ago, they seem insignificant compared to the problems you face now. Finding out how things end up, and seeing the path that your actions have paved, makes everything passed seem simple and logical. Even knowing this, I still look back on a time when I was faced with a troubling dilemma, a situation where I continue to wonder what I may have done differently. At the time, I brought my troubles up to Darren, a person with whom I could always confide without being judged.

His advice was to give no advice at all. He told me that he understood how I dealt with my problems, being one to always weigh the options carefully, and that he knew I would make the right decision. Perhaps being his older cousin, the one he himself has always turned to for advice, made the situation strange to him. Nonetheless, it was the first time I had experienced such a trust, and it was heartening to know that someone respected me enough to put his faith in me before I knowing what my choice was.

I admitted this to John, and he told me that the worst mistake he could make was assuming that I would make the right decisions. As he put it, it’s his job to keep me in check and make me constantly question the things that I do. Of course, he always presents things tactfully, so he doesn’t end up hurting more than helping.

Neither Darren or John is more correct than the other, because it all depends on the relationship. You need some friends to understand what you do. You need other friends to stab you in the front. I know I can count on Darren to accept my decisions, and I know I can count on John to give me the honest truth when I need it. The important part is the respect that goes both ways. Without respect, an opinion is meaningless. My introduction to the dominant/submissive lifestyle has given this even more significance.

Gimmie a girl who I can respect enough to understand this, and who can respect me enough to be her crucible.

The Thrice = Love Series

1. Introduction
2. The Journey
3. As The Crucible
4. Rock It
5. The Rush
6. Far From The End

I see the parts but not the whole
I study saints and scholars both
No perfect plan unfurls
Do I trust my heart or just my mind
Why is truth so hard to find in this world
Yeah in this world

‘Cause I am due for a miracle
I’m waiting for a sign
I’ll stare straight into the sun
And I won’t close my eyes
Till I understand or go blind

—Thrice, Stare At The Sun

Even at my age, whether others may consider it young or old, I haven’t decided on a specific set of beliefs, whether they be religious, philosophical, or psychological.

In trying times I find myself wishing that I had something, some form of structure that would make sense of the things that happen. The most serene people I know are also the most pious, as they seem to have an answer for the seemingly unexplained or undeserved. I’ve often asked theists, the ones whose intelligence I respect, what has made them believe in one or several gods. Most commonly the answer is that they have enough evidence for such an existence. Even though I’ve had a few serendipitous experiences myself, things which I can’t explain by chance alone, it hasn’t been enough to give me a definititive answer.

I used to be an atheist, then an agnostic, until I became completely undecided. It’s rare to find other people who are open-minded enough to admit that they are still learning, or have yet to discover what so many other people already have. What I know for sure is that I still have the rest of my life to find out, to walk that path and make that journey.

Gimmie a girl who isn’t afraid to stare at the sun with me.

The Thrice = Love Series

1. Introduction
2. The Journey
3. As The Crucible
4. Rock It
5. The Rush
6. Far From The End

It’s been more than two years since Thrice has released a new album, until Vheissu, just five days ago. I’m still exploring the tracks, approaching each song with an open mind, but never dissecting too much through analysis. Due to the uncertaintiy of what to expect, listening to something for the first time is always a little different.

It can be easily observed that they’ve grown through all of their full-length albums. It’s difficult to listen to Identity Crisis (2000), because of how rough and undeveloped it is. The Illusion of Safety (2002) was much improved, introducing a unique, experimental style, though heavily influenced by punk and metalcore. The Artist In The Ambulance (2003) took things a step further, achieving tracks that were both esthetic and intelligent.

Ever since I stopped smoking weed on a daily basis, of which a great deal of time was spent listening to music, I’ve been enervated by the fact that songs would never sound as good, until this album.

Vheissu has renewed my hope. Saved my life.

It goes beyond everything else to a completely spiritual experience, from the album artwork to the chords and the key signatures. Thrice has reached out with music that is haunting, moving, emotional, trying things that they’ve never tried before. Dustin Kensrue sings more than he screams, even goes falsetto(!), only occassionally calling on his hardcore roots. Electronic sounds, piano, acoustic guitar have been worked into the tracks themselves, instead of being relegated to the introductions. The mixed meters are less obtrusive, but still interesting enough for prog-rock fans. Even with all of this, they continue to defy genres, as they’ve done in their previous albums. It all works.

Thrice is coming to town, and the concert is just six days away.

I was only introduced to Thrice in the last two years, but I’ve been through a lot with them. Different apartments, roommates, girlfriends, breakups. Even the lyrics speak to me, lifting, moving, never crashing. I only ask one thing.

Gimme a girl who loves Thrice.

The Thrice = Love Series

1. Introduction
2. The Journey
3. As The Crucible
4. Rock It
5. The Rush
6. Far From The End