So there I was, sitting at my desk with my poppyseed bagel with plain cream cheese, starting to get hungry. I decide to get something hot to drink, so I grab my change, and walk to the hot drink dispenser in the kitchen. I grab a pack of choco and put it in the slot of the machine, insert my two quarters, and watch the machine inject brown water into my mug. In my head I have the taste of rich and creamy Second Cup hot chocolate, and this is what I’m expecting as I walk back to my desk before I take a sip. There were little solid bits of brown floating in the liquid, what I assume was just undissolved chocolate powder.

I take a sip. This hot chocolate is so fucking disgusting, that it’s hilarious. It’s not just bland and watery, it goes through levels and layers of bad taste. It starts out like instant hot chocolate from powder mix with a little too much water mixed into it. Then there’s a little hint of ash that fades before the distinct taste of burnt metallic cookware. The finish is all water, with no other taste whatsoever, aside from a hint of something that’s too light to be distinguishable.

And as I keep drinking this, I can’t help but laugh after every sip. It’s the most vile, most putrid, most comic cup of anything I have ever had.