February 28, 2004

More Gosu Than You

It’s always funny when some­one tries to play a mind game on me. For some rea­son they never work, so I really don’t mind them.

The secret, often con­fused with apa­thy, is actu­ally the will­ing­ness to sac­ri­fice every­thing, or the accep­tance of such. Unless one is pre­pared to give up every­thing, there are no guar­an­tees about what will hap­pen. When one accepts the fact that they may lose a rela­tion­ship, then one has noth­ing to lose.

It’s this power, this weight, that guar­an­tees a vic­tory. Bluffing such a thing is unpre­dictable and gen­er­ally not rec­om­mended. Of course, know­ing the oppo­nent inside and out is an advan­tage. It’s like see­ing his or her hand in a card game, and some­times, this is enough to win if one is unable to pay a high a price as a relationship.

Such a strat­egy may leave one with few friends, but who’s a friend who plays mind games?

Tagged as Filed under
February 28, 2004

Love Them Or Leave Them

I have a love/hate rela­tion­ship with Hong Kong films. I’m glad that OMNI 2 has become an eth­ni­cally diverse chan­nel, but every time a Hong Kong movie comes on, I’m not sure whether or not I should make some pop­corn or put an axe through the TV.

I love the movies because they remind me of every sin­gle thing about Hong Kong that has so poignantly affected me (and I feel smart when I get the jokes).

I hate the movies because 90% of them end up being crap like Love Undercover 2: Love Mission. It’s all a reminder of the sad state of affairs that Hong Kong pop­u­lar cul­ture is in right now.

Tagged as Filed under
February 28, 2004

Like The Colour Of Sound

Open the win­dow. It smells like night.

Beautiful.

Tagged as Filed under
February 27, 2004

As Long As I Pass

I can’t study with­out rewards. This may pos­si­bly be the fault of my par­ents, telling me from an early age that I’d earn some­thing for every spelling test I got per­fect. I told some of my class­mates at the time, who would earn noth­ing but the pal­try praise of their par­ents, and they rather pre­co­ciously told me that such a sys­tem was unhealthy. Of course, I was too young to under­stand such things at the time, and now I find myself unable to be moti­vated to study with­out think­ing that I’ll get to do some­thing fun as a break.

I’ve been try­ing to study for my account­ing mid-term all week, and couldn’t actu­ally get started until I knew that there was some­thing enter­tain­ing I could do. At first it was play­ing Chrono Cross, but my emu­la­tor was just too buggy. Then it was try­ing to make a new back­ground, but it ended up being too much think­ing for a break. I moved onto Uru, and I’ve been play­ing it ever since. I have to admit that there are worlds that com­pletely take my breath away. It’s one of the few games that really make me appre­ci­ate a high-end GPU. I wish I could be play­ing with Trolley, but I rather like being able to solve the puz­zles by myself. I’m always, always, ALWAYS the slow­est one in fig­ur­ing things out, and never the one who gets the answer if I’m play­ing in a group.

Tagged as Filed under
February 26, 2004

A Cat With No Worries

Dolly always likes to have her own chair. She gets so involved with her sleep­ing that she gets into all sorts of posi­tions with­out open­ing her eyes. Sometimes I catch her rolling her fat ass right off the chair, then give a shake of her head when she real­izes what just happened.

Tagged as Filed under
February 26, 2004

They Call Me A Grammar Nazi

I hate it when peo­ple use con­junc­tions in the wrong place. In my account­ing class out­line, for exam­ple, is the line, “Typewritten work will only be accepted”. I know what they’re try­ing to say, but instead, they make it very clear that the mark­ers must accept any type­writ­ten work. It makes me want to smear shit all over my beau­ti­fully type­writ­ten assign­ment, just to piss them off.

Tagged as Filed under
February 24, 2004

Actually, It’s More Like Never

I don’t make my bed more than once a week.

Tagged as Filed under
February 24, 2004

Level 1 Umpire

Last week­end there was a train­ing course for level 1 umpires in table ten­nis. It was dirt cheap, and only two hours long so I decided to go for it. Out of the nine peo­ple who took the test, only three passed, includ­ing me. The test was open book, unlim­ited time, but the ques­tions were extremely tricky. Since I passed, I can offi­ci­ate matches for both club sanc­tioned tour­na­ments and provin­cial level competitions.

Tagged as Filed under
February 24, 2004

Sometimes I Have Regrets

Ever do some­thing really stu­pid? Like, some­thing just plain rude or mean. And then feel totally bad about it, even though it was such a small thing and the per­son prob­a­bly under­stands why it was done. And then not be able to think about any­thing else except for regret­ting it. I hate when that happens.

Tagged as Filed under
February 22, 2004

Tremblant ’04

Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1
Tremblent cabin 1

Got back from Tremblant today. A bunch of us rented a cabin for the week­end about ten min­utes away from the moun­tain. I went snow­board­ing, or rather attempted to snow­board, on Saturday. There was a heavy fog at the top of the moun­tain and vis­i­bil­ity was extremely lim­ited, although the tem­per­a­ture hov­ered around a pleas­ant –5°C, a far cry from the –46°C from last year. I’ve def­i­nitely improved over the last time that I went, although I still can’t carve on the toe side. Every inch of my body is stiff now, from my neck to my ankles, but it was worth it.

Tubing 1
Tubing 2

We stopped by a lit­tle hill made for snow tub­ing on the way home. It only cost $17 to use the facil­i­ties for four hours, and there’s even a con­veyor sys­tem to drag the inner tubes to the top so peo­ple don’t have to walk up, the ulti­mate in lazy recre­ation. The hill was divided into eight lanes, each with it’s own char­ac­ter­is­tic bumps and jumps, and we tried to link up our tubes in var­i­ous con­fig­u­ra­tions such as multi-person daisy chains and leg locked lines. Possibly the best bang for the buck ever.

Tagged as Filed under
February 19, 2004

Amplitude

Sometimes it feels as if I’ve changed in an infi­nite num­ber of direc­tions. Every change comes as a result of some unsat­is­fac­tory char­ac­ter­is­tic of my for­mer self. The result, hope­fully a series of what I con­sider improve­ments, becomes the oppo­site of traits I once possessed.

Confidence is an exam­ple. It’s only now, after more than eight years of con­scious work, that I’ve gained some form of con­fi­dence, of self-respect. And I appre­ci­ate it now, not only in myself but in other peo­ple as well. It was my own dif­fi­dence that drove me to become an assertive per­son. This isn’t to say that it’s some­thing I’ve stopped work­ing on. I’m not quite sat­is­fied yet, because I’m still learn­ing to pre­vent over­con­fi­dence, but other than that I think I’ve come quite far.

The same goes for quite a few other things. Having no friends has made me a bet­ter one. Being alone has made me a patient lover. Being shy has made me more out­go­ing. Having gone through emo­tional ups and downs has made me more stable.

Being weak has made me stronger.

Tagged as Filed under
February 19, 2004

Usually It’s Dress Shirts And Sweaters

From one of my inside sources, I found out that the hir­ing freeze at the old gov­ern­ment job might be on hia­tus and they’re look­ing to fill some CS-2 posi­tions. Aaron and I con­tacted our old employ­ers to get together for some lunch tomor­row, and they ended up mak­ing reser­va­tions for 14 at the Mayflower. Aaron and I both know that this could be an impor­tant lunch, so we’ll be putting on the preppy clothes. We actu­ally had to dis­cuss what we’d be wear­ing, since we dress so similarly.

Tagged as Filed under
February 19, 2004

These Long, Lonely Nights

I sleep with two pil­lows. The big­ger, fluffier one goes under my head, and the smaller, less fluffier one I hug. I’ve been sleep­ing with two pil­lows longer than I can remem­ber, and it’s become dif­fi­cult to fall asleep with just one, which makes crash­ing at friends places and hotels a bit of a has­sle. Sometimes I sleep on my side with the smaller pil­low on my back and pre­tend I’m sleep­ing next to someone.

Tagged as Filed under
February 15, 2004

Five Days With John

I’m get­ting fuckin excited; John’s on a train headed over here and should be arriv­ing in about an hour. I haven’t seen him since Christmas, and even then we didn’t actu­ally have time to do any­thing except watch a movie. Before that…we came over for a week­end in July. I’m look­ing for­ward to five days of pure relaxation.

Tagged as Filed under
February 15, 2004

Breakfast Music

When the Nick’s away, the Jeff will dance to Billy Talent while he cooks breakfast.

Tagged as Filed under