I never tell anyone to keep my secrets. I only tell secrets to those I trust, which happens to be less than a handful of people. These people know me well enough to understand the gravity of what I talk about and gage whether they should keep it to themselves.

Whenever people ask that I don’t tell anyone else about what they’re about to say, I never even acknowledge the request. For me, it’s a complete given, something that shouldn’t even have to be said. I will rarely talk about anyone to anyone else, because one can never be too sure about what should be kept secret. Some people find that I take this a little to the extreme, since I won’t even talk about something like what someone ordered for dinner on the off-chance that they’re on a diet and don’t want others to know. The risk of hurting somebody is never worth it to me.

I think this way mainly due to the fact that I’ve gone through a lot of pain and trouble, simply due to some “innocent” gossip. I can’t fucking stand it when people talk about things that don’t concern them in any way, aside from only knowing the people involved. I especially can’t stand it when someone knows that saying something is wrong, and they go ahead and do it anyway. It’s made me a very unopen person to most. It’s not just the potential for hurt though, there are some things that I simply don’t want people to know.

But that’s another story altogether.

More people need blogs so they can express to something and save me from having to listen to the most boring, trite shit I couldn’t care less about.

I had the pleasure of Pat’s company this morning as we went for some Dim Sum. The meal was sort of meant to see me off on my trip, as well as celebrate Pat’s new job, and adapt my system to the mostly oil fried food of Hong Kong. The streets of Chinatown were quiet and serene, a stark change from the constant sound of traffic I get from the Queensway outside my window. Sunday mornings should always be this beautiful and cold.

There are times when a commitment is made on good terms and the bond of such a commitment can be easily honoured. However, there are cases when these terms become subject to strains that may threaten the relationship on which the commitment is based. When these strains overwhelm, the bond is broken.

The commitment, entangled with the relationship, should be broken as well.

However, this bond sometimes does not end. In such cases, the commitment cannot be said to be honoured; rather, it exists out of pity. Such a motive is rarely something to be desired. It is best to end such an engagement instead of falsely keeping it alive, for commitments, much like relationships, are partially based on the self-interests of those involved. When they are not, one person assumes the role of a liar.

And the other is being lied to.

A little while ago I put up an up-to-the-minute script that would tell me how many people were viewing this page, out of curiosity. It’s always interesting to find out that someone is visiting at the same time that I am. This week I noticed that I had 3 visitors online while I was updating. I was pretty surprised, since most internet surfers spend much less than a minute at a page before leaving (most will leave the page if it doesn’t load within eight seconds, a useful fact to know for web designers).

I checked my stats and found out that I’m still getting more than 100 visits daily, which is something that I don’t understand. I haven’t done much to advertise my site aside from a few Canadian blog listings, and only a handful of the people I personally know check on a regular basis. I don’t think I talk about controversial issues that really generate any discussion, or anything that’s very interesting for that matter. I don’t pander to potential visitors, I don’t censor myself, I don’t address an audience, and half the time I’m just venting about this or that. I first made this site over a year ago as an outlet for personal expression, and the purpose hasn’t changed one bit ever since. I wonder if people come here by mistake or looking for something specific. I personally have my daily reads (most of them female authors, since there seems to be a shortage of male bloggers) of people who have lives that are very different from mine. Most are just plain interesting, and some give me a few alternate perspectives.

I wish I knew what people came here for.