I have a ticket booked to Hong Kong at the end of November. I’ll be staying there for a little under a month, during the Christmas season when the entire island looks as if it’s one big ornament from the sky, a giant floating decoration. The best weather of the year is in December, when the temperatures drop to a reasonable warmth and one can actually walk around with a coat on.

I’ll be trying to learn the subway system for the first few days so that I can get around on my own. I’m going alone so I’ll probably be living with my uncle most of the time, and staying at my grandmother’s on the weekends. I’ll be going home first and staying there for a few days, then flying to Hong Kong, then flying back and staying home for New Years. I’ll meet up with Ken the day before I depart from Hong Kong, since he’s flying up from Ohio.

I can’t wait to get back to the busy markets, taste the Chinese food, browse the endless shops. I want to ask my grandmother so much, and celebrate Christmas with her. I wish there was something I could give her that she could keep, similar to the jade necklace she gave me that I’ve almost never taken off ever since I received it. There’s an almost ineffable feeling that’s conjured up in my mind when I think of the modern skyscrapers, the crowds of people, the very ethnic faces. Some of my best memories are from being in Hong Kong during Christmas, when there’s an almost mystic feeling in the air and everyone is in good spirits.

I’ve been wanting a vacation, from both the good and bad in my life, for so long. Just to get away from absolutely everything going on right now would be beneficial, almost like a self-imposed exile. I’d be able to distance myself from things and gain some perspective, something I usually believe I’m able to do until something drastic happens that changes the way I view things.

I’m not really sure what to expect from my visit, although I think that I’ll be changed ever subtly, maybe subconsciously. One can rarely walk away from such things without being affected in some way, perhaps both Tina and Em would agree. I just don’t know how this may change me. I don’t have any questions. I’m not looking for answers.

I’m just waiting to find out.

My aunt and uncle happened to be in town from B.C. yesterday, so they took me out to dinner and brought their son along. I don’t believe I had met any of them before, although they all seemed familiar. A difficulty I have with the Chinese culture is the fact that everyone is called aunt or uncle if they’re older, even if they’ve just been met. Our actual relatives (the aunts and uncles related by blood), however, have a completely different name system, mostly based on rank and which side of the family they are from. The problem ends up being the fact that I have no idea what the names of these people are, since we don’t append a first name to “aunt” or “uncle”, and I ran into that specific problem yesterday. I was able to go the entire dinner without having to call any of them by name though, so I escaped with my ignorance in ignorance.

Dolly has lately been sleeping under the rugs. Nick and I will think that she’s missing until we see a large lump in the living room rug. It’s pretty frustrating because every time I straighten it out, she’ll just dig underneath it and mess it all up again.

One thing that she’s been doing for a while is sleeping on things to mark them. Every time someone brings a bag or jacket into my room, the first thing she’ll do is sniff it out then sleep on it, which I personally see as a viable alternative to urination.

I’ve lately been getting into discussions where I generally show a strong sense of confidence in my convictions. The role of distance in a relationship related to the level of commitment, as a subject perhaps, or instructions in becoming a more sociable person, as another. I’ve been answering questions of life, love, and happiness almost as if I know the answers. Yet I can’t figure out where these opinions are coming from, or even where I’m getting the strength of my beliefs.

Have I gained so much strength so as to affect my thinking? Have I become blinded by overconfidence? Or do I consider my experiences to be sufficient enough to give advice when people ask me? This may possibly be the case even though I generally don’t like to give advice, since I only speak when I feel that I have a sufficient understanding of the subject.

The truth is that I don’t know where my assuredness is coming from. In the last few weeks I’ve felt an odd sense of wisdom, and my certitude seems to be coming from this feeling. Perhaps an overflow of emotions has caused me to feel this way, and everything I’m feeling now is temporary. The most important thing I try to keep in mind is the fact that I may be wrong in almost anything I believe. I need to keep an open mind. Yet lately I feel as if I do know much more about the way things work, the way life goes, the way the world turns.

I think of what I do know now, and try to remind myself that there is still a great deal I don’t know. I simply have a strong trust in my judgements, decisions, and convictions made with the limited amount of information one always has in foresight. I’ve lately become more certain about my life, and the direction I want it want to take. I certainly know what I want, but I try to remain flexible.

In the last two months I’ve learned more than I have in year before that, and the sudden surge of confidence I’ve gained in my opinions seems to be related to this. I realize that I’ve learned a great deal through the course of my life.

But I have much more to learn as well.

I snapped and bought Viewtiful Joe. I’ve been waiting for a game like this with old school play mechanics for a long time. Capcom heightened the sensation, and added in a bunch of great effects and depth. It’s a very difficult game, but extremely satisfying. I should really stop spending money like this, because I’m starting to look for things to sell.