Ever since I got my iPod, I’ve been a playlist listener, as opposed to an album listener like Nick. I had 10 main playlists, and each one would be for a different genre or mood, although I listened to my mood ones much more often, such as my bittersweet mix or angry mix. Now I’m find my moderate number of playlists to be insufficient. Often, when I step out into the intemperate sky which has been so dominant lately, I won’t be able to find an appropriate playlist. Nothing matches my moods now.
I think that my moods and emotions have become more subtle and diverse in the last year. It’s been harder to put my finger on how I’m feeling, because nothing is as base as a simple “sad” or “angry” anymore. I find that the flavours of my feelings have become more intricate and connected, not only because of simultaneous highs and lows, but also because of a greater application of dual-sidedness.
Sometimes it feels as if my emotions have evened out, that there is less range to the ups and downs. I’ve learned a great deal from the interesting set of situations I’ve been placed in over the last two years. This, combined with my zealousness for self-improvement, has allowed me to become a little stronger and a little wiser. Perhaps, in time, everything will even out. I’m just not sure if that’s a good thing or not.
Because I’d probably cease to learn.